Seen while shopping: "All our hams are locally grown!"

Technically not incorrect, I suppose, but it really makes me think of trees with hams hanging off of them. Or maybe a vine, like with passionfruit, but with hams. Are there people out there whose job it is to check whether the hams are ripe yet? Am I just overthinking this?

And, as a friend on Facebook said (I posted it as my profile), "I wonder if different kinds of hams grow on different trees ie a leg ham tree, a Virginia tree..." Probably, Rachel. Probably.

This is just an update for the sake of an update, as nothing has happened in the last four weeks that is really worth mentioning.

Except that I got a corset for my birthday. From my mother, no less.

That Is All.

Today is my last day of being a child. Y'know, technically speaking.
Dear God, I don't want to be a grown-up! I don't want responsibilites!
On the bright side, from tomorrow onwards, I can legally drink booze and watch porn. Whoopee.

My dog loves me very much, and it is adorable. However, it is not adorable when he sticks his tongue into my mouth, shoves his nose in a rather, uh - sensitive, shall we say - place, and then attempts to have sex with my leg, all in approximately ten seconds. Toby, sweetheart. Firstly, you've been desexed. Secondly, I don't tend to let boys of my OWN species do those things to me, let alone boys of a different one! Thirdly, you had been eating week-dead beef. I now know basically what a decaying cadaver tastes like, and it is NOT PLEASANT. If you MUST try and snog me, could you please have eaten something pleasant-tasting first?

Yours sincerely,
your big sister Rebecca

Nicked from nobleplatypus. You get to fill it out! Yay!


INFO
1. Name:
2. Birthday:
3. Where do you live:
4. IM:
5. What are you studying/What are you working as:
6. What makes you happy:
7. What are you listening to now/have listened to last:
8. Weirdest food you like:
9. An interesting fact about you:
10. Are you in love/have a crush at the moment:
11. Favourite place to be:
12. Favourite lyric:
13. Best time of the year:
14. Put a picture of yourself:


RECOMMEND
1. A film:
2. A book:
3. A song:
4. A band:
5. A TV show:

PLUS
1. One thing you like about me:
2. Two things you like about yourself:
3. Put this in your LJ so I can tell you what I think of you?

There are some super-cool tees online which I am considering buying.

What else can I say?


ETA: I just typed in "livejournal.com" as "liverjoural.corn". This amuses me in so, so many ways.

Are you my mummy?

Are you my mummy?

Are you my mummy?

Are you my mummy?

Are you my mummy?

Are you my mummy?

Are you my mummy?

Are you my mummy?

Are you my mummy?

Are you my mummy?


I hope I have freaked you guys out sufficiently! :D

I don't collect hats, but I do own them. I own one truly awesome hat (a cloche, grey, fuzzy, with a bow on the side). I co-own (with my mother) one other truly awesome hat (brown and orange velvet, with a teal velvet lining and a teal feather).
My other hats are more normal. I have two wide-brimmed hats (one white, one navy). I wear the navy one when I go to the beach, because it doesn't matter if it gets wet or sandy or sunscreeny, because it's easy to wash. The white one doesn't matter either, but it doesn't matter in a different way to the navy one, because it just goes with anything.
I also own two baseball caps. One is hot pink and says "I [heart] Hawaii", and my grandparents gave it to me a few years ago when they went there. My cousins all got matching ones too. My other baseball cap is black, with a sort of dragon on the front. I got it in Hong Kong in '05, on the Choir Tour.

Beside the wide-brimmed ones, the only hat I ever wear is the grey fuzzy cloche in winter, even though it smells like a decaying wet dog when it gets wet.
I have nothing to wear the brown/orange/teal velvet hat with, unfortunately.
Baseball caps are uncomfortable.
Oh, well. I don't know.


This was a filler post! I might think of something worthwhile to post soon.

It's been a long two weeks since I've updated.
And by "long", I mean "incredibly boring", and by "two weeks", I mean "a fortnight".
(On the subject of the word "fortnight", I'm going to start using the word "sennight" to refer to a week. It has historical basis, it's short for "seven nights", and just sounds way cooler than the word "week". Screw you, "week"!)

( Part One: School and Exams. )

( Part Two: Urinetown and Choir. )

( Part Three: Sleep and Dreams. )


Ayup. My life is weird.

So. It's been a while. "What have you been up to?" you ask.
Um. Not much. I had formal (that was fun) and there are pics up on my Facebook, so if you have my Facebook, you're in luck. If not, well, that's just tough luck.
Other than that, though, not much. Mid-year exams start on Friday, so wish me luck!


Now, I've been doin' a lot of thinking on weird topics recently, so if you have any answers for me, I'd love to hear them!

1) Human females (and occasionally males) are probably the only species to have enlarged mammary glands when we are not actually lactating. Why is this? Is it just to annoy us wimmenfolk? To give blokes summat to look at? I dunno.

2) If there were female vampires, could they menstruate and can they have little vampire kiddies? See, vampires aren't precisely dead, since they're immortal, but they aren't precisely alive either - it really depends on the fandom and the canon in question. If someone (or a vampire) is menstruating, it means that they can possibly ovulate, which means that they can possibly bear children. But if they were to have children, would they be vampire kids? And if they were vampire kids, would they be infants for Ever and Ever? And if they were, would we have a world full of evil vampire newborns??!

3) In the case of a zombie apocalypse, where should I go? A hospital? And if a hospital, which hospital? The closest one, which is actually just a rest home thingy? The RAH, which is further away but would have more tools and medicines and pre-packaged food? Or should I just hang out on the roof of my house with necessities (and an axe) and wait for it all to blow over?

4) If the aforementioned female menstruating vampires were lesbians, would they- You know what, I think I'll just leave that question alone.

5) Cats can't speak English, so why (in cat macros) do we assume that they have such horrific grammar and spelling?

6) Is the one-legged one-eyed flying purple people eater one-legged, one-eyed, flying and purple, or are the people that it hunts one-legged, one-eyed, flying and purple? And if it's the people that it eats that are one-legged, one-eyed, flying and purple, where would it find a one-legged, one-eyed, flying, purple person?

7) Why do I hate wearing hats when I look good in them?

8) Why do I still have books in my room which I have never opened? Is this normal? (and, FYI, I have over 600 books - there are about 20 that I have never read)


That's all for now. Stay tuned to this channel - the next episode of Rebecca Thinks Way Too Damn Much will be hitting your screens shortly! Probably, anyway.

So! I just thought I'd let you all know that I'm not dead, nor have I been grievously injured. So... yeah. I'll probably make a more in-depth entry soon, but for now I'm just touching base with you all.

I did a meme recently where I asked you to Guess The Pairings.
(http://thenameless1387.livejournal.com/25452.html)
OK, one person guessed.
So, I said I'd tell you what the pairings were.

1. Ron/Hermione (Harry Potter)
2. Howl/Sophie (Diana Wynne Jones)
3. Shrek/Fiona (Shrek)
4. Aly/Nawat (Tamora Pierce)
5. Maree/Rupert (Diana Wynne Jones)
6. Ginny/Harry (Harry Potter)
7. Sabriel/Touchstone (Garth Nix)
8. Martha/Tom Milligan (Doctor Who)
9. Sam/Laura (The Day After Tomorrow)
10. Joel/Cat (Nick Earls/Rebecca Sparrow)
11. Rose/Scorpius (Harry Potter)
12. Neville/Hannah (Harry Potter)
13. Ellimere/Francis Tindall (Garth Nix)
14. Kel/Dom (Tamora Pierce)
15. Nick/Lirael (Garth Nix)


So, those are my favourite pairings, or some of them. Hope you enjoyed the guessing game!

sitting in the library corner
catch-as-catch-can
hiding
waiting
What am I waiting for?
Listen to the sound of the airconditioning
voice small and eyes sad
People-watcher
writing my words
listening to the heartbeat of the school
There is no electric socket for the soul.
a forest of books and ugly carpet surrounds me
there are soft chairs but I don't sit in them.
I stay in the corner
listening
watching
waiting for things to change.

This sounded like fun. AND EVERYONE ELSE IS DOING IT, MOM.

Pick up to 15 OTPs.
Describe them in up to 15 words. (No way I can do this. I'm making it twenty.)
Have your flist guess the OTP.

Some of these will be a lot - as in a LOT - more obvious than others.

1. Books and cleverness; friendship and bravery. Sometimes, squabbling is the easiest way to communicate.
2. A heartless wizard meets a cursed young lady. Hilarity and happy endings ensue.
3. Monsters and humans; humans and monsters. Sometimes, the two blend into each other.
4. He changed himself totally for her. She let down her guard for him.
5. For life and for love, she had to walk to Babylon. And back.
6. To save the world, she let him go. But he thought of her when he almost died.
7. She brought him back to life. Literally.
8. The first time they met, she was saving the world. He doesn't remember it.
9. The world they knew was gone, but he still risked his life on a gamble that it would save hers.
10. Fifteen months of antagonism, and a happy ending.
11. The flower and the constellation. Their parents will just have to get over it.
12. Braver than he looks. Smarter than she seems. Professor and landlady.
13. Bossy-boots and clever officer. Awesome minor characters unite!
14. She ran away to find Haven. He followed to find her.
15. He reminds her of what they almost lost. She makes him remember the world he left behind.


Answers will be up in the next couple of days, if you really can't guess them.

ETA: Oh, come on! Isn't anybody going to guess?

ETA 2: I'll make it easier. Below, I will write the fandoms (or, well, the author or movie or TV show or fandom) and how many of the pairings are listed here. OK?

The Day After Tomorrow (1)
Doctor Who (1)
Shrek (1)
Nick Earls/Rebecca Sparrow (1)
Tamora Pierce (2)
Diana Wynne Jones (2)
Garth Nix (3)
Harry Potter (4)

I love to write. Yeah, I guess if you're here, you already know that. I write a lot of fanfiction, especially.

Recently I've been delving into Garth Nix fanfiction, in particular the Old Kingdom Chronicles. My first, most recent attempt has gotten up to 31 pages and 20434 words, and it doesn't look like it's slowing down any time soon.*

Sometimes, it feels like the characters are more real than the people in my life. Lirael, Nick, Mogget. It's not like making puppets dance, although that's what I tell people. It's more like I'm discovering What Happened Next. All right, I cannot write like Nix can. So I scribble details down, look through the books to check events, eat Mint Slices for energy at 1am so I can keep writing.
I find myself considering the plot of my story as I do normal things. Walking the dog, shopping, watching TV.

So I don't know. Sometimes I find myself thinking that that is the real world and that I am the fictional character to them, writing about their experiences.

*HELP!!

ETA: It is now 33 pages and almost 22000 words.

ETA 2: Finished! 40 pages (fuuuuck WHAT) and around 25500 words (FUUUUCK WHAT?!)

Recently, I have been writing too damn much.

Not here, of course.

Actually, I've barely been writing here at all.

Sorry.

No. On my school laptop.

Just let me point out: I LOVE MAC COMPUTERS NOW YAAAAAAAAY

So, like, fanfiction, and I'm planning a looooooooong story set during WWII. I might never get around to writing it, but it's a good start!

So, even though I haven't updated this thing in a while, I want y'all to know that I still read your entries and... stuff like that.

Ooh, and my Melburnian boyfriend is coming over at Easter!

I. Win.

Dear God,
Thank you for the bloke who invented air conditioning.
Yours sincerely,
Rebecca

Victoria is burning and nobody wants to talk about it. Fear? Maybe they think by talking about them it will make it real.
But it is real. And in some ways, not talking about it makes it more real, because people don't know.

It's so... so...
Well, I'm afraid. I live in a good-sized city, and a long way away from the fires, but I'm scared. Not of death, of course, not for me. But I have friends who live in Vic, or in the wide dry country areas of SA, and I'm afraid for them. And I'm afraid for me. I'm scared that the emails and calls will stop coming suddenly, and we won't know whether it's because the power's out or because they're dead or in hospital. I'm scared that they'll die alone and in pain because nobody will come to check if they're all right for fear of the bushfires.

I don't know what I can do. I can't donate blood (borderline anaemia) and while Mum's work is having a drive for necessities (non-perishable food, clothing, toiletries, blankets and pillows) and distractions (books, toys, puzzles) and of course for monetary donations, it seems like so little against so much.

I don't know.

Rules: It's harder than it looks! Copy to your own note, erase my answers, enter yours, and tag 10 people. Use the first letter of your name to answer each of the following questions. They have to be real . . . nothing made up! If the person before you had the same first initial, you must use different answers. You cannot use any word twice and you can't use your name for the boy/girl name question.

1. What is your name: Rebecca
2. A four letter word: Read
3. A boy's name: Richard
4. A girl's name: Rachel
5. An occupation: Road-safety instructor
6. A colour: Royal blue
7. Something you wear: Ribbons
9. A food: Roast beef
10. Something found in the bathroom: Razor
11. A place: Reykjavik (it's in Iceland; look it up)
12. A reason for being late: Road block
13. Something you shout: Rarrr!
14. A movie title: Robots
15. Something you drink: Raspberry daiquiri
16. A musical group: Red Hot Chilli Peppers
17. An animal: Rabbit
18. A street name: Ramsay Street.
19. A type of car: Rusty ;)
20. The title of a song: (The) Rainbow Song


I am so glad I'm not called Xena.

Welluh.

I... uh...

Uh.

Well. Um.



Holy shit.


Just... read my Twitter, people.